Sometimes, often, I miss Bangsar. I miss KL, I miss Malaysia so so much. This is one of those mornings. My heart cries for all that I have left behind and not seen for close to a decade. What I miss most is to be physically close to that place in Ampang where my beloved parents are buried. I want so much to be able to go and say a little prayer over their graves but for now, I know I cannot.
 
There are people and places I want to meet and go to. There is food I yearn to have. Things I have dreamed of doing – go to Penang to see Padang Brown where my dear wife and I used to sell burgers. Go to Kuala Kangsar to go home again to MCKK. Many many things that I know I want to do but I cannot.
 
And there are so many of you that I want to meet. In these years past, all that has kept us in touch are words…just words. It would be good to sit down with you guys over a Briyani dinner at Mahbub in Bangsar and talk…just shoot the breeze and talk of all those years gone by and talk about the years to come…all this I want to do but I know I cannot.
 
I cannot because I know I am a person of interest to PDRM.
 
1. 4/03/2006 : SF/MISC/CP0051/47114- tindakan telah dibatalkan
2. KPI(s)41/71.PTV(s) SPK 75/14 : item 2 still active – instruction to arrest upon entering. Special Branch.
 
Ironic is it not? For me, the police have always been Family. My late father’s life has been spent in the Police. He retired as Director of Cid under Haniff. I spent almost a decade of my blogging life writing against Umno, BN and the toxic corruption that is killing our beloved Malaysia. And now that we all have BN out of business and brought about change by putting PH into Government, the Special Branch wants to arrest me? For what? Ptui to PDRM. Ptui to PH for not making an effort to get me and other bloggers who have been persons of interest to PDRM free of any of this kind of harassment by the powers that be. And Ptui to the powers that be in Malaysia for forgetting the work we all…and by we all I mean all of us….that all of us have put in, to have PH in Putrajaya.
 
I accept that I will be arrested upon entry into Malaysia by the authorities. So I will not go home to once again see all the things that I miss and do the things I want to do. But thank God I have a choice. I will take Australian citizenship I will live in Australia and I will die in Australia knowing that at least here, I can do, write and live my life as I want to for as long as I do so responsibly and with grace. 
Selamat Pagi Malaysia…be kind to one another.
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